Before moving here, I didn't recognize the significant role that seasons play in our perception of time and the passage of years. I once stepped outside this cadence when I studied abroad in Botswana in the fall of 2007, but there’s something different about being, what feels like “outside of time” in your early 20’s versus in your late 30’s, when I’m striving not just to relish the holidays but to establish traditions and rhythms for my own children.
So here we are, with the days continuing to lengthen and the sun setting ever-later, scratching our heads and telling ourselves it’s Thanksgiving – even while we are winding down the schoolyear and building up anticipation for summer break. (All our fellow Aucklanders eyes widen and they begin to slip away into dreamland anytime mention of summer arises.)
Realizing Thanksgiving isn't celebrated here, I pondered how to make the holiday meaningful for my kids without succumbing to homesickness.
To strike that balance, we kept our celebrations simple. We reserved a dinner at a local American BBQ on Thanksgiving Day. It was enjoyable to relish traditional Thanksgiving fare on a relaxed Thursday afternoon with just our immediate family. We caught up on the Macy's parade over the following laid-back weekend, sharing another Thanksgiving meal on Saturday with American expat friends we've made. Then, on Sunday, we decorated our new home for Christmas.
Beyond our celebrations, I’d spent the past few months pondering how the kids could share their background with their classmates—what might be distinctly American? After discussions with Asher and Moss's teachers, it struck me that Thanksgiving, a uniquely US/Canadian affair, presented a perfect opportunity. As a family, we contemplated how to convey the essence of the holiday to their classmates.
Our family has loosely adopted a tradition of making Thanksgiving Turkeys (idea credit to Busytoddler). I love anchoring the holiday in the spirit of gratitude, so sharing this activity with their classmates seemed like the way to go. Thanks to Charlie's patience and willingness to go along with my whack-a-doodle plans, we spent the weeknights leading up to Thursday robotically churning out hundreds of construction paper shapes and components to prepare the turkeys.
On Thanksgiving Day itself, each kid stood in front of their class, sharing the origins of Thanksgiving. They spoke a bit to why + how we celebrate, and then we showed this youtube video. I was grateful that the whole exercise provided Charlie and I with a space to actually have the conversation about the fullness of the origins of Thanksgiving. We talked not only about the story of the pilgrims from our elementary school plays and textbooks, but sought to be honest about the reality of the broader history, acknowledging that while the holiday origins reflected harmony and cooperation, that the broader history between European settlers and the indigenous/first peoples was rooted in injustices. (I thought the Youtube video helpfully struck this balance as well.)
One of my favorite parts of watching the kids present in their classes, beyond simply taking great joy and pride in seeing them speak with confidence and excitement to their peers, was to watch all of the things that their classmates chose to write on their turkey feathers. Not only did a few sweet kids ask me to spell out my name so they could include it on their turkey, but it was also heartwarming to see them jot down the names of family and friends, hobbies, and interests. One young girl amazed me by choosing what I would dub the "simple gifts" (a nod to the Shaker Village near home), listing things like "to exist in this world, I get things, everything, friends." Another's list was as delightful as: "pizza, love, sister."
A photo I snapped as I left Asher's class struck me profoundly; it captured one of his close friends, her hand artfully writing on her feathers, displaying the beautiful henna tattoo she'd gotten earlier that week. Their class had been discussing and appreciating the Diwali holiday earlier in the week.
At work a colleague had mentioned that he and his family had celebrated Diwali over the previous weekend, and that much of its celebration boils down to "gathering with family, sharing a meal, and simply being together." While there is rich and distinct meaning behind each of our traditions, I reflected on the fact that both are grounded in coming together around a table; gathering with family to enjoy good food and fellowship.
The fact that all my kids are afforded the chance to learning about holidays, culture, languages, and traditions from diverse backgrounds at school - especially Pacific Islander cultures we previously knew little about - has been one of the greatest treasures of our move. Contributing to this through the Thanksgiving exercise brought me (+ our whole family) immense meaning and joy. Overall, I am very grateful to be here and for the small yet meaningful ways we celebrated.
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